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Why I have decided to do this now I will never know. The stories you will hear and tales that will be spun will be magnificent. They will tell you of the sorrow, the despair, and how out of the ashes of a burning world came the greatest glory most men will never know. They will tell you of the heroic stand in Chungir City, how Fredon fell at the river over pass holding off a thousand heretics, they will tell you how Bragen sacrificed his life to save mere mortals, and they will tell you of that final battle. The one where in glorious triumph, when all hope seemed lost the Imperium of man with the help of the Emperor’s Angels destroyed one of their darkest enemies on that glorious day. What they don’t tell you is that every space marine, no matter how conditioned he is, will have a moment. Some of my brothers may have many if they live long enough. Those moments will test a marines’ resolve, his duty to the ultimate goal of protecting the Imperium from all enemies. What happened on that fated day was not glory……it was slaughter. This is my story….
In what seems like a lifetime ago I lay dying on a battlefield of my homeworld. As I clung to edge of life, the brightest floodlights I had ever seen illuminated my vision. All I remember was being lifted into the air by a monster, then everything went black. I don’t know how much time passed before I awoke but when I did I was in fear. I was suspended in a vertical cylinder filled with some viscous green liquid. Metal needles poked and prodded my body, long tentacle like cables were inserted all over my legs and arms. My eyes were blurred but somehow began to focus through the liquid until it was as if it didn’t exist. Outside the healing chamber stood three of the biggest beings I had ever seen. One had a face shaped like a skull, one seemed to have lightning sparkling around his head, and the third had red piercing eyes that seemed to stare into my very soul. I panicked and looked around only to see other tanks with other human beings in them. A tap came on the glass, “Ah good, you are the first to wake. I knew you would be strong.” The one with the lightning had approached the container and began to speak. I could see the lightning was not just my imagination, it was really there. Small arcs crackled around his hairless head reaching out and touching an elongated piece of armor behind his neck. It was quite strange, but as he continued to talk his voice gave me a sudden calm. It was then that I learned of my new fate.
I trained hard, ingested as much knowledge as the chapter masters could throw at me, and believed not only in the chapter…but the Imperium. We are the wall between good and evil, the last beacon of light in a dark future. We are the Emperor’s Angels. I rose quickly in the ranks of my fellow scouts and as I loved and respected my brothers, they did the same in return. On some backwater planet I can hardly remember the name of my squad was lost to me. All nine other scouts and our commander killed by the wretched greenskins. If the seething tide of Orks had managed to over run our position all would have been lost. I managed to hold them off with my sniper rifle and a combat knife long enough for my brothers to arrive and purge the xenos scum. Shortly after that I received my black carapace and was welcomed by my fellow brothers as a tactical marine. I served a decade as a tactical marine rising to the rank of sergeant with my own squad. Then the distress call came in.
I was summoned by the company commander to the bridge of our starship. “A distress beacon has come in from Gradon V. We are altering course to assist. You,” he pointed at me, “your squad is young and eager for battle, you will deploy with Librarian Dixer to the surface along with one scout squad there you will meet Inquisitor Jefon. He will explain the situation on the planet.”
I glanced at Librarian Dixer who gave me a nod and looked back at the company commander “For the Emperor it shall be so!” We left the bridge and I felt a slight burn at the back of my mind. Without stopping or looking back I said, “Good to see your coming along Brother Dixer.”
“I would not have missed you first real encounter as a squad leader brother,” his calming voice washing over me. “It is my honor to assist you on this mission. Now go assemble your squad I’m sure they are eager to hear the news.”
“I assure you the honor is mine brother.” I said locking eyes with the librarian. I made my way down to the training block my squad was in. the door ground open with a heavy clang and eagerly my brothers snapped to attention. I gazed at each one of them knowing not all would return. “Brothers! Today we have received a great gift. For on this day we will purge the heretics plaguing Gradon V.”
“FOR THE EMPEROR!” They shouted as one
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The mission was simple enough. Meet with the Inquisitor, learn of the situation, neutralize the enemy. I knew my commander wanted me to call for back up but I was eager to prove myself amongst my brothers yet again. That’s why Librarian Dixer would be coming, to monitor the situation and report back on my command, a scout could see that.
We hit the surface under the cover of nightfall. Thunder hawks swept low over the wide grassland plains until the mountains appeared in the distance. It was then that I realized the gravity of our situation. A city had been built into mountains face, and outside the city walls were the heretics. A thousand fire pits burned in the distance getting ever closer. The techmarine lowered the door of the thunderhawk and I took hold over head. I felt the presence of Scout leader Thraven next to me. “That’s a lot of heretics for one squad brother.”
“Calm yourself Thraven, lest your brothers see you tremble in fear.”
“No, not fear brother. Worry. Worry we’ve been sent on a fool’s errand.” Thraven grumbled as he turned to sit next to his squad.
I could not argue with him. Thraven had seen countless battles on countless worlds, but the number of the enemy was grossly underestimated. I looked back at Thraven with a grin, “Don’t worry brother, I will have a little chat with the Inquisitor when we arrive.”
Inquisitor Jefons’ neck bones began to crack as I tightened my fist around his neck. “You- You cannot do – this!” he exclaimed grasping for air
“You have led us to our doom!” my vox caster roared out of my helmet.
“Perhaps it is time to let the Inquisitor down brother,” Librarian Dixer said quietly stepping out of the shadows. “the color purple is not a good look for him.”
“As you wish.” I grumbled tossing the Inquisitor to the floor. “You have brought use here under false pretense-“
“There is no false pre-“
“YOUR DISTRESS CALL SAID TEN THOUSAND HERETICS! Yet I look out these windows and some five hundred thousand beings encamped outside our doorstep and that number is growing everyday! You don’t have a small outbreak of chaos, you have a pandemic. Not to mention Inquisitor you and your people are trapped here in this city with no way out other than to fight or die. It is no wonder to me why you called us to save you.”
“I thought, I thought you would send more men.” Holding his still bruised throat.
“More men?” I boomed with laughter, “Inquisitor just one of my brothers is equal to a thousand guardsmen, no we will not need more men. Now get out of my sight and tell the Commissar I want to know how many people in this city can hold a rifle! Oh and Inquisitor…”
“Yes lord?” he said stumbling to his feet.
“If you ever interrupt me again, you will never speak again.”
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Twenty-five thousand. That was all we could muster from local civilians and remaining Imperial Guard regiment. Twenty-five thousand humans, a squad of space marines, and a scout squad, and a librarian. Against Five hundred thousand and growing. The planet had been overrun long ago. The Imperial guard regiments stationed here were quick to turn tail and run or swayed to the forces of chaos. We were trapped. The only way out to fight, or meet a glorious end for the Imperium. Our luck turned for the worse when a vox transmission came from our ship. They had been called to aid on another planet a system away. Transmission details seemed odd to me but I understood my duty. We were to hold until our brothers returned to reinforce us. It was then I had an idea “Scout leader Thraven I must speak with you.”
Months went by since I had assigned my brother to his mission. Brothers began to fall, Inquisitor Jefon was thrown to his death in a skirmish with the heretics outside the main gate, and all the while our makeshift Imperial Guard diminishing from battle and starvation. When I saw the enemy beginning to build better encampments across from us I began to worry my brother had failed. Then one morning, as the sun began to rise it was joined by a beacon. A slow green burn rocketed upwards towards the heavens. “Come brother it is time.” Librarian Dixer said.
I stood outside the main gate amassed with my brothers and what remains of the fighting civilian force. I held my force axe in the air. “Today we make a stand. Today we stand not at space marines and guardsmen, but as the Emperor’s very will! TODAY….WE SMITE THE ENEMY!”
“FOR THE EMPEROR.” Thousands of voices screamed at once. I turned my back and stared at the wall the enemy had built in front of their camp. My vision narrowed, my twin hearts began to beat faster, I was ready.
We charged. My brothers and I far out pacing the civilian and Guardsmen behind us. Good, I wanted it that way. I wanted my brothers and I as light as possible for this. It wasn’t going to be pretty. Rifles, pistols, and melee weapons only it was going to get close and personal.
About two hundred yards from the wall a crimson plume shot towards the sky. The scouts had blown the wall. I reached the gap and swung my axe, taking the heads of three heretics at once. “With me brothers!” and soon enough they were into the fray. Limbs were cleaved, bolters sang, and heretics burned. My brothers and I cut a bloody swathe through the oncoming horde, all the while something nagging at the back of my mind. We had momentum on our side, all around us Melta bombs exploded that had been planted earlier by the scouts. A few short hours of vicious fighting later and my brothers and I along with our remaining defense force stood victorious. It was utter annihilation. Not one enemy survived.
Librarian Dixer approached me “Brother I sense something in this building.” It was a large make shift hab unit. My brothers and I approached the door with caution. CRACK. A shot from a bolt pistol resonated from inside. I kicked the door to splinters and entered the building.
“—–YOU ARE FREE!” CRACK, as Inquisitor Jefon put a bolt round through the eye socket of a heretic. He stood in the middle of the command center with three heretics laying before him. He pointed his bolt pistol at the fourth heretic.
“Inquisitor? You’re alive?”
“HA! If you can call it that…”
“Inquisitor what do you mean?”
“You see,” CRACK as blew the brains of the last heretic all over the floor. “I’ve been using you fool. These people, they’re not heretics!” He cackled with laughter.
I felt the all too sudden reality of what was bothering me earlier hit me like a squiggoth. There were no signs of mutation. No blasphemous signs or writings. There was nothing, we had been so blind in our efforts to wipe out chaos and prove ourselves that we missed what was right in front of us.
“That shining little city you and your forces came from, they’re not chaos. These farmers you and your brothers slaughtered, they’re not chaos. I’M CHAOS! All I had to do was to tell this group that those in the city were heretics and then tell those in the city that these farmers were heretics. Do you see the irony?! Both sides are fighting for the Emperor! And to think I was only a few thousand deaths away from being able to summon the blood god.” His laughter began to rise to a shrieking level. That’s when a blast from Librarian Dixers’ plasma pistol silenced the traitor forever.
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It was sometime later I stood on the observation deck. It was the only place I could seem to find peace and quiet lately. Staring through the glass into the abyss. The small burn at the back of my mind gave him away before I heard his heavy footsteps on the metal floor. “I may be a psyker but I don’t need my gifts to see you are troubled brother”
“Brother Dixer”
“That was a smart maneuver sending the scouts over the mountain to sabotage the enemy base. I’m sure the chapter will hear tales of your genius. Many of those scouts will even be receiving a black carapace for their actions. What of you brother? I heard you have been offered a set of terminator armor.”
“I do not deserve it.”
“And why not?”
“Hundreds of thousands wiped out by my hands. I should have seen.” I said smashing my fist against the railing.
“Not all things are easily seen brother. Chaos is an inhumane creature and manifests itself only when it wants to. There is nothing you can do. What’s done is done and we have new orders. Have you spoken with Chaplain Revanor about what troubles you?”
Knowing it was an order more than a suggestion I shrugged my shoulders and began a long walk down a dark hallway towards redemption.
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