I thought I was all caught up but I realized I almost missed recapping Week 9. I thought about letting it go, but who am I to miss an opportunity to laugh at my friends and not with them. Nothing about this week was pretty, I mean really the highest scoring manager posted 116 points. This was a knock down, drag out, slugfest across almost every single game and frankly I was fucking exhausted after Monday. Let’s revisit this nightmare.
Drunken Avengers (DA) vs. Deep Space Niners (DSN)
Projected at 124 to 123 points in favor of DSN, Sunday would have both managers cheering and fearing checking their lineups as the tables turned all day long. By the close of Sunday DA would only have one shot left hoping a strong defense would pull off the miracle. Spoiler alert – they didn’t. The results of the bout would tie both manager’s records into Week 10, but DSN would reclaim the top spot based on points. Well played bud, I owe you some Romulan Ale.
DA (6-3) 99.27 – DSN (6-3) 115.65
Princess M (PM) vs. Darwin’s Law (DL)
DL would feel the burn of last week’s Fuckening as his #1 draft pick would be sorely missed this week. It almost looks as if the entire team was deflated coming off the mid week news Derrick Henry would be out the remainder of the season with foot surgery. It wasn’t pretty on the other side of the field as PM would barely scrape her way past 100 points, firmly being carried by her starting QB who dragged the rest of the team kicking and screaming to the end of the finish line.
PM (6-3) 100.87 – DL (4-5) 84.14
Thai Chili (TC) vs. Nino De Oro (NDO)
Another closely projected matchup would see points dwindle away rapidly throughout the week as almost every single position for both managers would underscore their projections. Where TC would get one player to outperform, NDO would motivate two players to exceed expectations and that ability would prove to be the difference.
TC (3-6) 86.81, NDO (5-4) 102.56
Lt. Dan (LD) vs. Sunday Funday (SF)
Well, well, well, well, well, how the turntables……Jumping on the ugliness like her usual Saturday night, LD saw opportunity amongst the chaos like the way she stalks her prey at a bar. Projected at 126 to 125 in favor of SF, the tale of the tape wouldn’t stand. SF would maintain an early lead deep into Sunday, but for once where LD usually falters, she shone bright like a….diamond’s too elegant, cubic zirconium? That’s more like it.
LD (2-7) 116.39, SF (5-4) 103.87
Saquan Deez Nuts (SDN) vs. MFFGA (stupid)
If the entire weekend wasn’t pretty, this matchup was day shift on a Monday at a strip club. What was it SDN said last weekend? “I’m back!”. Yea looks like you’re back in the suck. An absolutely abysmal performance (which had nothing to do with the Dawali celebration the night before, I promise) from both managers would at least take the eyes off the other managers terrible performances, as fans would request their money back and dam near riot afterwards. Let’s set the stage original projections had the score at 139 to 105 in favor of SDN. Fair play right? What we got was sheer non-committal by any player on either team to put up points. Both managers would only see two positions score in the double digits and only one of those positions would actually be exceeding their original projection. Somehow some way, MFFGA would take the win by two points despite a defense posting a fat goose egg.
SDN (3-6) 77.70, MFFGA (5-4) 79.50 – go look at those original projections again.
As I’m currently writing this during the Week 10 games, I looks like another miserable week for a majority of our managers. The standings currently reflect a three way tie for first, a three way tie for third, Darwin’s Law by himself in 7th, a two way tie for 8th, and Lt. Dan firmly on her back in 10th. Can someone go check on her? Tune in for the Week 10 recap coming soon!